I don’t like writing when I have to write, but when I don’t have to write writing is alright. Actually, it’s more than alright, it’s outstanding! Writing is a living tension: it is a source of pleasure, even as it is a source of pain. The pain is the looking at a blank page, which is a symbol of the myriad of possibilities that exist in my mind regarding any topic that I might address, as well as the ways I might address it. This can be overwhelming, and it is this sense of being overwhelmed that often keeps me from writing. A counterpoint to this, perhaps even a counter-pressure, is my overwhelming desire to express myself, particularly through words. I have come to see that in the process of writing, I am enabled to see what I likely would not have seen. It’s like Joan Didion says, “I write entirely to find out what I am thinking, what I am looking at, what I see, and what it means.” This is my experience, and thus when I don’t write I am always wondering what I am missing. So this is my tension, I live between the overwhelming possibilities of a blank page, and the overwhelming idea that if I don’t write I might miss something crucial.